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How to be a provider
Plus: Heat-seeker
Geoff Girvitz
March 06, 2025
In partnership with
Today on Dad Strength
Heat-seeker
How to be a provider
The Fracturing
An article, a quote, a dad joke
Heat-seeker
A warm-up is just that. If you accomplish nothing else, you should bring your body temperature up. It can be unbelievably simple to do. Jog, bike, jump rope, and then just do a couple of light sets of your first movement. Easy. That being said, there’s one great opportunity that is often left unexplored in warm-ups. It involves positions that challenge fundamental coordination in a productive way.
Here are the criteria:
Simple
Slow or isometric
Challenges stability or mobility in a useful way
Body temperature rises noticeably—and quickly
Having spent a lot of time experimenting with different positions, I found that there were times where an otherwise strong and physically capable person would struggle with something that looked easy. That was interesting. Rarely was this just a position—but more about the details of how it was executed. So, I would mess around, adjusting things here and there until we clicked that last puzzle piece into place… Then Boom! Within seconds, I could literally feel the heat come off a person’s body. Strong people would start to shake and sweat. What’s the cause? Let’s not get lost there. The more important thing is that there is low-hanging fruit all over the place—and that we can feed two birds with one apple when we tackle movement and warm-ups at the same time.
Want to try one?
The classic bird-dog
It should be doable right?
Start as shown. But do the following:
Angle your elevated heel downward—toward where the floor meets the wall
Do the same with the ring finger of your elevated hand
Unlock your other elbow and rotate it toward your back
Bring your weight over your planted hand
“Pull” the ground backwards with your planted hand as if you’re trying to bunch up a rug (don’t actually move anything)
Re-check all of the above positions. Rinse and repeat if necessary
Drive your rear heel and front ring finger down and away, reaching and lengthening your body
Report back
How to be a provider
Meet your kid with full attention and presence.
Create an emotional environment where it’s normal to struggle, fail, get back up and try again because building mastery starts with failure.
Ask questions. Challenge. Be curious.
Understand that a sense of unfairness or injustice—even in the most frivolous or child-like scenarios—is valuable and important. And that it should be treated with seriousness, even when the situation itself doesn’t feel that way.
Combine high expectations with high support.
Lead by example with health, fitness, and self-care.
Have a lot of books in the house—and be seen reading them.
Know how to create challenges that foster both confidence and intrinsic motivation.
Regularly model the phrases “I don’t know,” “I made a mistake,” and “I’ll have to look it up.”
Make detailed, authentic descriptions of life’s small wins so much a part of your kid’s life that they become part of their vocabulary.
Relax and just be with your family.
There are plenty of more traditional ways to “provide” and I’m not saying that they’re not important—just that there’s so much more.
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The Fracturing
Childhood can be pretty magical. We tell kids stories of good guys and bad guys. We teach them to have a sense of justice and fairness. We tell them that their effort is more important than the outcomes.
And then they walk into our current world and see that not all is as-advertised
I don’t know what the age is where this fracturing happens… where they discover that we not only experience injustice but regularly tolerate it.
I call this The Fracturing.
How do we meet our kids in these moments? What do you say? How do you make it make sense? How do you help heal the wounding of The Fracture? Or can you?
I don’t have an answer for you, I’m sorry to say. But I have a lot of questions. If there’s anything you’d like to share, I’d love to hear it.
Support Dad Strength for only $5/month
What I’m reading/watching:
A quote
“Let us forget with generosity those who cannot love us.”
An existential dad joke
Kid: We’ve been at the grocery store forever. Why are we just going up and down the aisles!?
Dad: Because, my child, the aisles stretch not in mere distance, but in longing. We wander, not seeking food, but the meaning of hunger itself. Also, I forgot the list.
Take care of yourself, man!
Geoff Girvitz
Father, founder, physical culturist
dadstrength.com